# Anabelle Jolyn
# 4th May
# Her Daddy's Princess
# dorty_blurry_jolyn@hotmail.com (friendster)
# ask me for my MSN


# The Most High
# Family
# Friends
# Being a missy girl.
# Those who're hunky-dory to me


# Feeling negative.
# Things that don't go the right way.
# Calls and texts not being respond.
# Being admonish.
# Backaches.


# Make wishes/dreams all come true for me.
# Be myself.
# More time for everything.
# All to be healthy and happy.
# Him*

@ 1:43 PM


alrights. i've given up on getting that zara dress already, it's nowhere to be found. and after looking at the picture, i think i so look fat in it. so bah, it's ok if i don't get it, i'll just try to get another dress or something to make it up. heees...

as for the ribbon purse from charles and keith, i'm considering. i wanna get a new purse!! baby says the material isn't good and it'll wear off fast. but it's cute!!! it'll sit on the pending list till i found another one. oh ya, and the garter, it'll be on pending too. cos it's something i want but not i need. suddenly feel that i've grown up a bit and know how to think yea? lols.

and so for the rest. i want and i need all of them!!! though i've got a pair of heels the other day, getting another pair will be bought if it really catches my eye and belongs to me. hahas. i forgot to add in my lavin perfume!!! the miniature and the100ml ones!!

GIVE IT ALL TO ME,PLEASE!!! :D

my line was being terminated for half a day yesterday, the outstanding bills. passed the cash to my dad already and he jolly well forgot to pay it for me. i thought that my sim card is faulty again, so i went down to the customer service and got stuck there for about an hour.

managed to pay all the bills for my dad and exchange for a new sim for my youngest brother. before that i went out with my mum to the maid agency to look at the maid's portfolio, engaging a maid for my gonggong. he's so poor thing.

just got discharged for 2 days and now he's back in the hospital again. he went for a sudden emergency operation yesterday noon, hope that he's doing fine now. the doctor took away the rotten intestines and join the good ones together, gonggong's intestine gave way and spilt when the doctor tried to insert the device to check his insides through anal.

i guess i could feel the pain. it hurts me so much to see gonggong go through all these. he used to be a healthy man, all fit and hearty. but now, he couldn't really walk and is all thin and weak. i really hope that daddy God would let him recover soon, please.

i'mma end my post for now. stomach is growling, gonna go eat and then check on the laundry. Mister A is on leave for 2 days, long weekend darling. shiok right?! better do your spring cleaning and all hor, chou tan!! :P
@ 1:12 PM




@ 11:07 PM


thanks for coming over darlingboy. thanks for the company and for trying all so hard to make me happy. i'm sorry that i'm so whiny and dull about everything. always causing you to be worried for me. =/

i'll try to be a good girl alright? i'll take better care of myself; eat when i need to, rest when i'm tired and etc ok? but i know that even if i take very good care of myself, you'll still be there to take care of me all over again, from head to toes! hahas.

no luck with job hunting recently. BOOHOOS. i'm practically sitting around and doing nothing at home already. mum's gonna start her shits again, haven't been on terms with dad these days too. i dont feel any need to put up with any nonsense that's not related to me, dont blardy vent any anger on me. NOONE.

went out to town yesterday. i'm so upset!!!! couldn't get that zara dress i wanted!!! ): damn me, i should have just buy it that day and not wait for another day. now it's like cleared from the outlets already!!! i'm so sad!!! pffft.

but baby was sweet enough to walk around with me for the whole day to shop and look at anything i want. though we didn't buy anything except for the orange addias jacket that i set my eyes on half a year ago and only manage to chance upon it AGAIN yesterday.

there was a sale going on, and it's only half price; $55.55. the nicest thing was baby bought it for me! i was so glad when i found that jacket hanging on the shelf and baby didn't let me have any time to think about buying, he just took it and go. afraid that i might regret and make alot of noise if i didn't buy and miss it again, like how i sulk the rest of the day about that zara dress.

nevertheless, i'm gonna go to the city to check if that zara dress is still available. not gonna just give up like this yet! hahas. i wonder when will i be able to go out and shop again, it seems so overcrowded everywhere these days. is it because of the festive season? goodness.

there're so many more things that sitting on my shopping/wishing list. i wish i get a job soon and i'll have the moolahs to get all of it. ):

- that zara dress. ( i really want it so badly!!! )
- that white bag and ribbon purse from charles and keith.
- a pair of shoes.
- foundation, blusher, mascara, eyeliner and eyelash curler. (my cosmetics are smashed. -.-)
- garter. (hehe)
- undies!! ( my smart mother put my undies out to dry and somehow, i dunno how, it's all gone. prolly the wind's so strong that blew them all away or someone stolen them! YIKES! *roll eyes* )
- bras! (one more week to the voucher's expiration date.)
- a new phone. (mine's really cranky. it's going crazy, i'm missing out on the messages coming in already. =/)
- accessories, excluding earrings.

these are all that i could think of at the moment. i need to accomplish them! =/ gotta get them 'cept for the phone before new year. else i've got nothing for the new year. ): and yes, gotta make an appointment to go do the nails for my mum and me next week, and get the brows trimmed!! (:

i've trimmed and cut my hair already. it's back to my nice black hair, all natural!! i like!! my curls are wearing out, thus i'm gonna spend more time doing my hair than usual so it wouldn't look so messy. it'll be as straight as i can manage to make it. hahas. =/

that's all for this post. i'm going to watch the teevee for now. it's wisely time! lalas. have a good night everybody!! :D
@ 10:22 PM




@ 10:20 PM


i know i shouldn't be feeling this way, it's crap. i hate it, to the core. but it's been craved so deep in me, that fear; the fear to be disappointed, the fear to know things that i shouldn't, the fear of losing myself again and the fear that i'll never be able to get up anymore.

tel me what to do. i dont have the confidence. i know that we've all been trying, but it still comes back to me after a while, it still hurts me so much for being such a fool. been too nice, been taken advantage of, been cheated of, been in too much shit and now, here i am, dont know what i want; too lost.

i guess it's one of those fucked up emo days or rather to say night.

these few days, i've been thinking. about quite alot of stuffs. i couldn't sleep well at any time of the day, i can only lay in bed and wait, wait for the time to come. for me to feel sleepy and doze off, but that's not the end. i'll dream but when i wake up, i wouldn't have any recollection of my dreams. it tires my mind so badly, i get headaches from it sometimes.

working life is is such a whore. getting a job isn't very hard as long as you've got the will to find one, but getting one that you like and pays well, it's hard. i'm going for a job interview tomorrow, hoping i'll get a job soon. it's a bore staying home and facing the walls.

it's good to be away, not to be harrass. those times i wasn't happy at all, it'd become out if pity-ness that i stayed. i regret wasting so much resources, people were there to warn but i turned a deaf ear. in the end, i've got myself to blame for being hurt, being cheated on, be whatever that'd turned out on me.

you didn't love, maybe you did but that's not enough. there wasn't any form of care and concern, it's always that cold flat tone. i dont feel like talking anymore. i'm sick of acting like i dont mind if i'm not being surprised, not being cuddled and whisper sweet nothings to, not feeling anything when you talk to some other girls. i'm sick of acting like i dont mind about everything.

i want to be the only and one of someone. the only one that someone ever needed, ever wanted. the one that you'll want to come home to cuddle with, to have dinner with and spend all the time you have with until the end of the world, till the hairs on our heads turned grey and white.

i want to be pampered, i want to be loved, i want to be surprised, i want to be heard. i want to be the one that you hold hands with and tell the world that i'm the one and you're proud of it. i want so much and to be so much more.

I WANT TO BE THE ONE.

where are you?
@ 9:47 PM




@ 1:40 AM


I'VE BEEN TAGGED AGAIN!!

This is a survey about your dream wedding, whether it be in the next year or after ten years (30 years).So, please answer after you read, the person who answered this before you took a great deal of effort. This is going to be fun.

1. How old are you? HE: 28 this year SHE: forever 19
2. Are you single or in a relationship? BOTH: in a relationship
3. In what age do you think you’ll get married? BOTH: 2 years from now?
4. Do you think you’ll be marrying the person you are with now? HE: yes, definitely. SHE: I do hope so~ :P
5. If not, who do you want to marry? HE: dunno, can i not get married? HER: ANDY LAU!!! *dreams*
6. Do you want a garden/beach wedding,or the traditional church wedding? BOTH: can we have all the weddings? hees.
7. Where do you plan to go on a honeymoon? BOTH: Europe.
8. How many guests do you think you’ll invite? HE: 100? SHE: 200?
9. Do you want an extravagant wedding or a simple wedding? HE: simple. SHE: simple yet memorable. (:
10. Do you want the traditional vows or something you’d make up on your own? BOTH: traditional vows!
11. How many layer of cake do you want to have? HE: never thought about that, 3? doesn't matter. SHE: it's always the 3 tier cake. i want a 5 tier cake, with princess belle and prince charming standing at the top. :D
12. Do you prefer having your reception at a hotel or at a simple place? HE: no preference. SHE: i perfer somewhere by the waters. like by a pool or on a yatch with clear blue water surrounding.
13. When do you want to get married,evening or morning? HE: morning. SHE: from morning till late into the night! hees.
14. You’d rather have your reception outdoors or indoors? BOTH: outdoors.
15. Do you like a grand entrance for your groom? (for girls) SHE: of course!
16. How do you like your bride to enter?(for guys) HE: as dramatic as possible, sent down by a helicopter?
17. Name the song/tune you’d like played at your wedding. HE: i've always been thinking about that, but i'll go with whatever the bride chooses. SHE: collide by howie days
18. Are you a morning person or a night person? BOTH: night person yo!
19. Do you want a solemn ceremony or a light one? BOTH: light one will do, solemn one can be annoying. :P
20. What age do you want to get married? HE: 24. SHE: when i have the ability to.
21. Describe your ideal husband/wife. HE: a little silly, press the button and she'll laugh. SHE: someone who loves me like his life and can do the housechores for me! hahas. i'm his queen!
22. Do you prefer fine dining or just the normal spoon & fork/knife? HE: if i have the kachings, i'll go for fine dining. SHE: simple one will do just fine, but fine dining would be good. LOLS.
23. Champagne or red wine? HE: Champagne. SHE: Champagne, with the hint of apple taste and smell. :D
24. Honeymoon right after the wedding or days after the wedding? BOTH: days after the wedding.
25. Money or household items? BOTH: the S-eleven; $$!!
26. Who will pay for the bills? HE: my wife la, i'm a house-husband staying home to look after the kids. no la, both will pay. SHE: both will contribute. (:
27. Are you ready for married life? HE: yes, seen too many that didn't work out so i know how to make it work. (: SHE: i'm not too sure, not ready to handle some family matters yet. i'm fine like now, no problems cohabiting though. (:

@ 12:22 AM




@ 5:31 PM


oh no!! i can feel the laziness in me~~ i've been online from the moment i open my eyes till now, but i did sent my resumes out online. :D i'm such a slacker now. poor boyf, i hope he doesn't mind having a girlf like me and having to provide for me. LOLS.

so it's like i've got nothing done today. but i've planned for tomorrow!!(: lalas~

i'm going to wash my new clothes for the new year, make jellies, tidy my room up abit. and then in the night, it'll be the usual 'hiao' day! stjames for sharon's birthday, and maybe zouk for mambo! wheee~

guess there'll be quite alot of people clubbing tomorrow, 'cause there's an enlistment on friday. so they gotta party hard before they lose their freedom to the government, poor hoto big boy. heehees. lucky girls, no national service! 3 cheers!! :D

i'm so flared up with my connection these days. keep getting disconnected halfway through, waste of time and turns me off. grrr. -bites-

and and and!!

i wanna go shopping!! like so badly. when's pay gonna come in? ): i hope susan calls me soon. though it's a really pathetic sum, but i need it to pay for a lot of things!!! and a job soon please!!!

i want that dress from zara; i hope it's still available, that lovely white bag from charles and keith, not forgetting the ribbon purse from charles and keith too. i need to shop for another pair of shoes and some accessories too. =/

seems like a lot eh, doesn't it? but it's been so so long since i had retail therapy!!! can't track back how long ago la. who's going to sponsor me?!?! heees.

oh, my mum's best la. she swipe my credit card and spent alot, my dad complaint and now my credit card's gone while she got a new one herself. how evil~ poor me. ahhha well, it's less burden for me too anyway. just that it gets irritating sometimes to think that i'm so fucking missy.

BOOS~
@ 5:10 PM



@ 11:01 PM


okays. this is how bored i am, i'm waiting for baby to get home and chatting on the net while doing so. we're all posting friendster accounts up and viewing each other, that's how bored we are. ):

and i didn't go to work today. i'll start job hunting again tomorrow, no time to lose man! grrr! everyday is a war, a battle! let's fight with everything we have!!!

channel 5's showing heros, i've got it on but i'm not watching. crap, baby's hero's disc is with me for some time already and i havent start on it. BOOS!!! he's got gossip girls for me! YAY!!! tell me how not to love him la. hahas.

i'm insane!!! lalas~ and yes, my pictures that're not uploaded yet, are snowballing. oh the zoukout video too! i dunno how to rotate it la!!! ):

i've sent so many copies of my resume out, but there's no calls no nothing. i'm so sad!!! hopefully i can get a job that i'm interested in and work hard!!! for a better future!! here i come!!!

alrights, baby's calling already. i'm gonna stop blogging ,continue with getting online and talk to him! byebye~
@ 10:32 PM




@ 9:06 PM

i dont know who i am. i dont know what i want. i'm so over with myself.

@ 9:03 PM


i need to feel love, to feel pamper, to be at the top of the world. i'm selfish, i'm arrogant, i'm bossy. i am a attention seeking bitch.i need surprises, i need to be whispered sweet nothings to, i need to see that actions are actually louder than words. i need so much more.
@ 8:55 PM


i'm lonely.i'm empty.i'm angry.i'm sad.i'm vex.i'm moody.i'm whatever.just dont you care.

@ 7:06 PM




@ 6:40 PM


where's the love!!! ): i feel neglected these days. is it real or is it just me? i'm starting to feel the terror in me again. oh how i dread it. someone save me please.

i no longer feel as pampered as before, same goes to being loved. what's wrong? i know that it's hard for eveyone, including myself. i know that i'm stuipdly demanding. i'm just scared, afraid. and that's measures to be quite a huge amount balled.

feel so fucking enough of it. i wish i could go away and never be back here. let me fade away, without the pain, without the sorrow, with nothing. i'd enough of being someone,noone,everyone,ME.

i feel like screaming my lungs out, kick my legs around and acting like a kid sometimes. but i've got this demon in me, pulling at me each time when i lose myself, putting a hand over my mouth to keep me shut from shouting; making me hurt so much more.

i can feel myself falling, free falling. the gavity's pulling at me too, can't wish for me to hit the bottom ground so much more, in a fast pace. i dont know what can i do anymore, to release myself. now, i'm just waiting, waiting to be taken away at any time. i'm not here anymore.

MAYBEIWASBEINGDELUNSIONALALLALONG,RIGHTFROMTHESTART.MAYBEIT'SAMISTAKE. I'MNOTHTEONEAFTERALL.
@ 6:30 PM


*sings* it's a raining day~ and i'm in a cranky mood. everyone's out to grandma's place and i'm home alone. waiting for my laundry to be done and lazing in bed at the same time. i should be doing my spring cleaning and all but i'm just too lazy and not in the mood to do anything.

---

above was typed at about 4 in the noon just now. when i was in the kitchen searching for food, i realised my washing machine's lid's open!!! that's means my laundry was there for about an hour UNWASHED!!! *slap forehead*

it's a boring sunday, and i'm feeling so lazy. i'm supposed to fold some newspaper for my dog to poop but i've hide them away somewhere, else my mum start making noise again. i can hear the doors unlock, guess they're home. turn off. -.-

i'm still thinking if i should start work tomorrow. if i dont get a better job soon, i'm afrad i'll go back to the super lazy me. that just sucks to the core la!!! ):

@ 3:45 PM



@ 12:41 PM


i'm suppose to blog before i leave the office on wednesday, but the manager was so late that day. by the time he got into the office it's already 6.20pm, getting all the things he wanted done, it's already 6.30pm. i handed my resignation letter to him and couldn't hide the joy of my leaving. how evil eh? lols.

and so, with the excitment to leave as soon as possible, i forgot the blog the last time at PAC. ah wells, forget it. say goodbye to PAC, the boss, susan, uncle sam and the workers. it was nice working wth you all.

yeah, the advertising company that i applied for the marketing executive position call me up for the second interview. it was held yesterday. 70% of the time will be outbound, while the rest will be in office; learning graphic design and what's required. the curly hair manager said that he wish to see me at work on monday. i'm still unsure of it! ):

if i accept it, i think i'll be tired out everyday. and did i mention the working hours? weekdays, 8.30am-6.30pm and saturdays, 8.30am-3.30pm. that's what putting me off, not to talk about the pay too, it's kinda pathetic. though we need to travel out of singapore, how many times would it be? lols. i'll be out of town for 2 days in the first week of february to KL, if i take it up. should i,should i not?

flurry sweetheart's on her way to the company now for interview, she was telling me to try out for a month and she'll accompany me. but but but, my saturday's burnt!!! how sad is that?!?! *wails* i'm so upset thinking about it la.

i wanna get a job related with events! i'm more interested in it! even though it'll tire me out most of the time and i'll whine about it, i'm just more than willing to go into events.

GET ME AN EVENTS JOB!!!
@ 12:25 PM




@ 4:15 PM


this will be my last day updating my blog in the office of PAC. i'm leaving!!!! like finally eh. it wasn't that bad working here except for the longwinded ladyboss, the noisy susan and piles of work waiting to be done. what job can let you get online most of the time?

i'm not upset about leaving, i actually can't wait to leave. i've printed my resignation already, gonna hand it to my manager later so that he can pass it to the boss next week. i left my job as a responsible person, finished up what's on my hand and everything. there's nowhere i can get just doing admin work in a small company.

tomorrow, i'm going for my second interview at granton singapore, located at pandan loop. it's an advertising company, and i'm applying for the marketing executive position. i hope i get that job, cause it would mean more exposure and i think i'm more suitable for jobs of this kind other than sitting in office doing shitwork.

i know i haven been blogging recently for quite a stretch of time. don't ask me to update about it, cause i probably forgotten already. :P but on a lighter note, i'm much more of a happier person now. (:

it's wednesday today, my last day at PAC. tomorrow will be my 2nd interview at 9am, hopefully a new phrase beginning! zouk tonight? hmmms....
@ 11:38 AM


yes i've been busy recently. doing what i'll update soon. right now, i'm going to finish up my preparations and head out for my interviews. that's right, i took a day off from work to go for job interviews. i dont wanna stay in PAC anymore. wish me luck people! i'm off!
@ 1:49 PM




@ 1:30 PM


i guess this is the only channel whereby i can express myself, but still not totally. there're somethings that can't be revealed. too many people, too many pairs of eyes watching.

i'm so sick and tired of everything, how i dread everyday now. how i wish those medications didn't save me, i only feel even more horrible now. i used to wish to lead a normal life, what now? i'm at lost...

i'm a girl, by nature. i wanna be hold, be whispered sweet nothings to and i do wanna be pampered like a princess sometimes, being loved and all. i wanna be showered with all the love, care and gifts from everyone. how i long for so much more...

but i've gotta give myself a tight slap, to wake myself up from the delusional world. everyday is a war, i fought it once and i'm going to do the same thing right from the start over again, but this time at twice the speed as the first.

i've been relying on others too much recently, that's so unlike me. thus i've gotta use both my hands and feets, to stand up and build bricks now. those resolution for the new year are such rubbish,
i know that i probably would stick to it. they're not practical, just thoughts of my wants.

where was the girl that i see when i used to look into the mirror?
@ 1:16 PM


i'm not someone you can mess around with, proceed with caution at your own risk. be nice to me and i'll doubly nice to you. do not betray my trust as it's hard for me to trust and once you bend it, you're so over.do not come on strong head on against me. listen to me, do not be inbred. i'll love and protect those who loves me, they'll be the blissful ones. while the others bane.

@ 4:27 PM


nothing much to blog about recently. just the same old routine of going to work and home, except for wednesday; that's to mambo then home for a couple of hours of sleep. work the next day again, nothing new.

i'm freezing in office now. they've got the centralised air-con up already, thus i can't switch it off. ): and i heard that the contractors are coming to knock down some things in the office this weekend. hopefully that soon soon the office will be done.

i'm still contemplating whether should i tender. was talking to susan, my colleuge yesterday and we wanted to leave the company together. she's been here for 9 years already, know everything inside out.

suasan went to hand in her letter first, and had a long talk with lady boss. in the end, she's not leaving, gonna stay and see how things goes. of course boss doesn't let her go la, she's been a very good worker. what a pity to let go if it happens.

as for me, i told my boss that i feel like i'm too piled up with work. neverending work and needa handle those things that's not within me job scope. it's not that i mind doing more things or learning. but sometimes, somthings requires decisions, what if i made a wrong decision? who's to blame? it's just tough at times.

alright alright. enough of grumbling already. daddy's home today, and most probably i'll meet the family up for dinner. back to work before boss comes back for the second time of the day! bye~
@ 4:05 PM




@ 11:20 PM


something interesting to share! LOLS.

Most Important Men in a Woman's Life:
1. The Doctor - who tells her to "take off all her clothes."
2. The Dentist - who tells her to "open wide."
3. The Milkman - who asks her "do you want it in the front or the back?"
4. The Hairdresser - who asks her "do you want it teased or blown?"
5. The Interior Designer - who assures her "once it's inside, you'll LOVE it!"
6. The Banker - who insists to her "if you take it out too soon, you'll lose interest!"

are you laughing now? HOHOHO~
@ 11:14 PM




@ 2:54 PM


okay okay. i know that i'm oh-so-late!!! but who really cares right? hahas. everyone is having their own fun time in the year of twothousandandeight! i'm having my fair share too!!

Boohoo! as i'm here blogging,it's pouring outside HEAVILY! how am i going to head out later?!?! and william asked 'st james tonight?'. unknowingly, it's like become our saturday routine, and i was telling people i wanna change my wednesday spot. POW!~

now i stuck mamboing already!!! it's been fun fun fun!!! never thought that i'll get my head so into mambo in the past, but now~ wahahahas. HEY!!! MAMBO PLAYING ON THE RADIO NOW!!! *mamboing*

done mamboing. goodness me. my phone was down for a couple of days, and it's a hassle really!!
mike tried to call from US, lotsa of people tried to get me and andy's the poor one. gotta wait for my calls and call my office to look for me, else online.

mikey!! aint you jealous that we're having fun here without you?!?! it's mambo on wednesday and st james on saturday!! darn, where did the house party gone to? all your fault la!!! BOOS!

anyway, i have been enjoying the company of the 9am-6pm people on irc. we had so much fun chatting, and sweetheart flurrie so nice~ she buys me chocolate all the time!!! i'm so in love with her!!! lalas~

and i've got loads of overdue peektures, from the yester-year! ranging from my run-down office to the long waited day out trip with connie. it's a whole lot alright?! i wonder when will i have the time to get it all up.

working in office have been a torture already. boss's really evil. i wanna look for another job then quit, but but but. which job can be so relaxing like this one?! ): sighs. if boss pays me more,and lessen my workload to those within my scope. :P

i should have gotten my resoultion up by now right? so here it goes, not ranging in order!
1. lose those fabs. 5-8kg will do please!!!
2. read more!! more language is going down down down~
3. love those around me more, including myself!! hees.
4. be less missy. =/ you think i can do it??
5. spend less and save more!!
6. get the driving liscence!!! it'll be more convienent then.(:
7. be more of a lady. *cross leg and cover mouth-giggles-*

it's only 7 now. i'll go think and think about it. hopefully i'll clear this messed up mind of mine and come up with something more practical and achieve-able.

for now, i'm going to finish up my letter and get ready to go out!! noticed my way of blogging now? new year new style. wait till i find a nice blog skin. this's with me for so long already. =/

till then. byebye people. have a fun-filled daturday. :D
@ 2:25 PM




@ 12:15 PM


WOOOOHOOOO!!!~
it's been a while since i blog eh?
i'm back!!!

first of all,
i wanna wish all of you;
A HAPPY 2008!!
may the resolutions you set this year be fulfiled.
(:

i've done up my resolutions,
but have yet to put it up;
on my blog nor my cupboard.
LOLS.

well,
i'll put it up when i'm home later.
and i've got tons of pictures to upload and show you guys.
lalas~

for now,
i should get to work.
one more day to the weekend!
:D

iwantthatgarter,iwantthatgarter,iwantthatgarter.
@ 12:03 PM