# Anabelle Jolyn
# 4th May
# Her Daddy's Princess
# dorty_blurry_jolyn@hotmail.com (friendster)
# ask me for my MSN


# The Most High
# Family
# Friends
# Being a missy girl.
# Those who're hunky-dory to me


# Feeling negative.
# Things that don't go the right way.
# Calls and texts not being respond.
# Being admonish.
# Backaches.


# Make wishes/dreams all come true for me.
# Be myself.
# More time for everything.
# All to be healthy and happy.
# Him*

it's the last day of the year,
and i'm all dressed up for work today;
despite being late.

BUT!!
upon reaching the office,
i could hear susan cursing.

and TADAH!!!
the office's in a mess!!
all dirty and dusty!!!

no,
our office wasn't being ransacked,
but it's the major renovation that the whole building's going under.
and now,
it's my office's turn to be transform.

i'm itching all over my body now,
i'd just showered and smell all nice before i got out of home,
now,
sighs.

and it's like there isn't any privacy around,
the workers are walking all over the place,
and looking over our shoulders from time to time.
HOW I HATE IT!!!

i'm going to help clean up a bit for now,
and hopefully,
it'll be a half day.
(:
@ 10:18 AM




@ 1:10 PM


what if one day;
i walk out,
leave and not come back?

what would you do?

time is running out,
life is cutting short.

i wonder this morning while lazing in bed,
how did the people from centuries ago,
define time, dates, months and everything else.

doesn't everyone live one day as it comes by?
for me,
it works that way.
and everyday is just another same dull rountine.

tend to have a lot on my mind recently,
it's good to know that the brain is still working,
but it tireds me out a little.

they're all so random.
i didn't know who to ask,
or how to explain.

it's themselves that everyone loves.
maybe i just need to search for my inner self,
search within.
i should.
@ 12:53 PM




@ 12:49 PM


it's the time of the month.
oh, how i dread it.

all the cramps,
the backaches,
the blosted tummy,
the excessive intake of food,
and the grumpy-ness.

it's so troublesome being a girl!
):

thank God it's friday today,
that means weekend's coming soon!
i can hear it calling!!~
WWWWOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOHHHHHHHHHHHHOOOOOOOOOOOOOO~

gonna rest myself well today,
not feeling quite well.
the sinus, cough and sore throat are such a pain!
BOOOS~

daddy's coming home today,
don't think he'll make it in time to take me out for lunch.
shall see if the family can do dinner tonight.
(:

pray that it'll be a great st james night tomorrow!
gonna call up a few people to inform them to go and party,
and hopefully,
the menses wouldn't be a mess.
=/

it's the last weekend of the year!!!
may next year;2008,
be a blasted year filled with many many folds of good returns and happiness!
:D

will blogged about the new year's resolution soon.
10 mins to lunch time!
i wish i could go back home and cuddle up with my stitches under the duvets.

i've a pair of new toy;
stitch and angel bonded together.
lalas~

off to print somethings.
so long~~~~
@ 12:37 PM




@ 6:11 PM


Quit playing games with my heart- Backstreet Boys.

Even in my heart I see
You're not bein' true to me
Deep within my soul I feel
Nothing's like it used to be
Sometimes I wish I could turn back time
Impossible as it may seem
But I wish I could so bad baby
Quit playin' games with my heart

Quit playin' games with my heart
Before you tear us apart
I should've known from the start
Before you got in my heart
I live my life the way
To keep you comin' back to me
Everything I do is for you
So what is it that you can't see
Sometimes I wish I could
Turn back time, impossible as it may seem
But I wish I could so bad
You better quit playin' games with my heart

Quit playin' games
Baby, baby the love that we had was so strong
Don't leave me hangin' here forever
Oh baby, baby this is not a lie, let's stop this tonight
Baby, quit playin' games
Sometimes I wish I could
Turn back time, impossible as it may seem
But I wish I could so bad, baby
Quit playin' games with my heart

Quit playin' games with my heart
Before you tear us apart
I should've known from the start
Before you got in my heart
I live my life the way
To keep you comin' back to me
Everything I do is for you
So what is it that you can't see
Sometimes I wish I could
Turn back time, impossible as it may seem
But I wish I could so bad
You better quit playin' games with my heart
@ 6:01 PM



@ 11:28 AM


[K] cause everything is self-delusion.
[K] it's like u nv exist.
[me] yea. i'd never exist.
[me]i tot like this too.
[me]i'm like this character in a story and ppl are reading it.
[me]my movements are what the writer writes about and i act upon.
[K]well said./
----

above was an extract of a conversation of me and a irc chatter whom i know for sometime.
and i really feel like what i'd said in it.
how saddening is it,ain't?


my christmas was just like any other day,
except that there's no work.
i still woke up early,
'cause the family's required to go to grandma's place for grandpa's 49 days ritual.


came home near to 5am the previous day with my brother and his girlfriend.
headed to sky after the christmas countdown,
i was locking my gates at 12mn with andy.
lols.


both of us doesn't feel christmas-ty.
and connie's home doing up her projects,
that poor girl.

this year's christmas's sad la.
no presents no nothing,
not that i mind, really.

i've got season messages.
so that'll do i guess.
and sweet flurrie got me a pouch with some candies in it.
nice~

a year's gonna pass just like this,
with me not acheiving anything and all.
BOOS!

random-ness now.
STOP BLOGGING!
till i'm sane~

@ 11:09 AM




@ 2:58 PM


not fair not fair!!!!

it's a half day work,
a holiday for others!!!
but it's a working day still for me!!!

though i can knock off at 5pm,
but what's the difference?!?!
it's only 1hour and 30mins early dismissal.

andy's going off at 3pm,
but he's nice la.
will be staying in his office till later,
'cause we'll be meeting!!

oh,
and i guess i'm going to meeting flurrie;
5pm at central.
she said she's got something for me,
how sweet~

GIMME ALL I NEED,ALL I WANT FOR THIS CHRISTMAS!!! PAMPER ME LIKE A BABY!!!(:
@ 2:52 PM



@ 11:22 AM


i'm trying to recall what happened over the last few days as i start typing this post.
hahas.

friday;
was work.
nothing much,
nothing new.
just that there wasn't any houseparty or whatsoever.

saturday;
my dad came home.
and it's was a bad day!

got woken up by my mum early in the morning,
and all those naggin of hers bottling up in me.
i sorta burst,
but i did held back la.

in the night was st james powerhouse,
with connie, andy,william,sharon,huimin, belgrand and his 3 girl friends.
quite a crowd eh?
william's not used to having so many girls around.
LOLS.

sunday;
was a day out to town!
with connie.
we headed to wisma's ichiban to fill our starving stomachs.
and connie camwhore with my phone!

afterwhich we walked to cineleisure.
it was pouring and we got drenched!
luckily there was a guy who's quite a nice soul,
he sheltered us from the hotel to cineleisure.

though it's such a short distance,
it's much appreciated!!
:D

from cineleisure,
we walked all the way to plaza singapura,
pay my phone bills and drop connie's cheque.
a bit of shelter here and there on the way there,
so not that wet afterall.

central was the last stop of the day!
i wanted to get some stickers,
and to try the craving-for-so-long cupcakes.
sheryl and andy came to join us in the end.

the cupcakes're not bad,
the decoration's awesome!
i'm a happy girl~

WWWWHHHHHEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE~~~~~~~~~~
@ 11:02 AM


i'm going out with the family in a while,
and i feel effing pissed and disgusted by my mum.

weekends are the only frigging days that i can sleep in late,
and rest at home.
but she'd never let me do that.

she's always screaming on top of her lungs,
making a whole lot of noise,
and hence resulting in the waking of everybody.

i'll be in a utterly bad mood if i'm being disturbed,
i'm feeling that way now.
i'm so angry that i dont even feel like doing anything,
i could only blog it all out.

GGGGGRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRR!!!!~~~~

first thing i step out of my room,
was to ask me when am i giving her money.
-.-

that only make me boiled more!

it's always that bloody possession!!!
go get a fucking job,
and see how tough it is to earn your own cash la.

you bloody don't know what i have to go through,
to just earn that few hundreds.
and mind you,
it's only a small sum of pay,
i'm not earning thousand of dollars a month OK?!?!

i'm not keeping any of my earns if you must know,
i'm not even spending on myself,
it's always right hand in and left hand out.

just stop bothering me!
it'll all be too late when i blow my top.
@ 1:10 PM





@ 1:21 PM


though it's a bright sunny morning,
i wasn't in such a nice good mood.

i tend to think a lot.
there's always a lot on my mind,
random random stuffs.

and i'm reconsidering myself working here.
it's not that the job isn't good,
it's just my boss.
she's only 35,
acting like a 70 year old granny.

never fails to call up umpteens times everyday to remind us to do things,
it's not like we're not doing our jobs.
she's just too uptight about everything.
-slaps forehead-

and being her everything,
pisses us off.
there's only 2 person in the office;
susan and me.

susan says she wanna quit,
'cause she approaching 60 alr;
thoug she looks young,
and she's not happy working here.

sighs.
what should i do?
studying is still the best la.
=/

oh ya!
i had a fall at orchard on wednesday!!

was on the way to meet flurrie and some others from irc,
after a great dinner with andy, alan and shermaine at wisma's ichiban boshi.
when we're walking there,
just outside takashimaya's LV,
the floor's slippery and my heels are a bother!!

i fell!!
scar-ed andy's arm.
=/

luckily my bum is cushioned,
hence it's not that painful.
and thank God there wasn't too much people.
LOLS.

today is a friday that feels like a monday.
OH CRAP!
there's no half day for me on monday;
christmas eve lehs!!
):

hopefully i'll feel better soon.
so till then~

I do pray that everything will be just as nice.
@ 1:10 PM




@ 4:22 PM


it's such a horrible feeling to be all left out,

it's all second hand information that would have come to be known of.



don't give excuses,

'cause if you don't have the heart to do so,

you can come up with endless of EXCUSES!

just bring it to light and tell the world that,

YOU DON'T WANNA TO.



and no spare tyres.

NO!

only when others have no time for you,

and you couldn't think of anybody else's company,

will you come running back.

FUCK YOU.

yes, you'd heard me.

FUCK IT!!

I'M NOT GOING TO LEAVE IT LYING DOWN ANYMORE.

BUGGER OFF.



i'm glad that those around me are having a blast in their lives.

just do remember to take care of yourselves,

'cause i can't be there all the time.

thanks for those happy moments that we'd shared.

the things that we'd done for each other,

much appreciated.

i'm going to log out now.

to go shower and wait for the one to come by.


have a good day people,
enjoy your holiday.

lastly,

good nights mikey.

xoxo,

AnaBelle Jolyn.
@ 3:04 PM




@ 2:03 PM


Take a look at this.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=oHu5jP6V9FM

Would things be better if I'm not who I am?

after watching this video,
my mind's flooded with lots of thoughts.

I'm not ready. ):
@ 12:46 PM




@ 11:18 AM


it's 9.56pm and snowing at where mikey is now.
he's left on a sunday morning,
to new york.
i wanna go there too!!
):

some of us went to the airport to send him off,
and i'm the super hardworking one.
woke up at 7.30am to prepare,
then took the train down to changi airport.

bumped into andy on the train,
was trying to check where he's at,
tadah!
we're on the same train.
LOLS.

alan couldn't get out of bed to send mikey off,
as usual went to boat quay to drink.
mark and adele was there too,
not to mention mike's family.

it's sad to see him go la,
those times that he took so good care of me,
checking on me all the time,
and always there.
he's really a very good friend.

MIKEY!!!
i know you'll be reading!!!
must take care over there,
and call back when possible alrights?!?!
we'll all miss you!!
(:

after watching mikey passing the immgrations,
we all left.
andy,adele and me went to bedok to meet alan for lunch.
been a long long time since i ate there,
food was good!
(:

parted our ways after lunch,
and i went to granny's place to nap,
following by dinner afterwhich.

blues on a monday!
was kinda busy doing my datas,
and it was a horribly lazy day.
crap.

met brian for dinner,
talked and talked.
got home at about 10pm.
MY PHONE GOT BARRED!!
):

bought work home to do,
just in case i can't finish.
boss's evil,
pushing us all to the walls already.

luckily there's a public holiday,
thursday!
but that means no bedroom night on wednesday,
gonna be too packed!
BOOHOO~

i guess that's all for now,
so long~~~
@ 10:53 AM


it's lunch time now,
and i'm here to blog.
nothing much to update on,
just that i'm almost all well!

but there's something that i wanna post up,
it's the boyfriend issue.
it's been at me for quite sometime,
and i think i should just get it off.

i've been in 2 horrible relationships (before these i had a short and sweet first love);
the possessive-ness is simply too much to bear,
and the abuses that accompanied along the way.

and it's effing stupid of me to have stayed in these 2 relationship for the longest period,
both lasting 1 year plus.
i don't know what's wrong with me,
don't ask me.

i'd always prayed that they would change for the better,
but nothing was improving.
for my own good;
maybe it's being selfish,
i chosed to leave in both that situations.

when i got myself out of the previous relationship,
i didn't hope for another relationship to come my way or anything.
i just wanted to let nature take its own course,
and enjoy doing things single-ly.

i hope for my guy now;
to be able to think like an adult,
to be able to be independent,
not possessive(being caring and possessive is just a line's difference),
not abusive,
most importantly love me and not take me for granted.

i want us to be the envy of everyone,
i don't wanna play hide and seek games anymore,
i want us to be accepted by others,
and not hide the relationship.

it's all too tiring.
and yes,
honesty,faith and communication is the key.
i hope through it all;
things will work out.

bahs.
enough of these already.
i better go get some food,
and take my medicine.
if not i'll get scoldings again!
:P

I get down on my knees and pray.
@ 1:10 PM





@ 11:33 AM


okays.
it's been about a week since i last update.
the previous one was not counted!
hahas.

i'm feeling better now,
from the flu bug that's it.
but my voice is so horrible,
sounds like man!
):

looking forward to tomorrow!
filled with events,
guess i'm going to take a half day off from work.
and pay's gonna be pathetic.
=/

what's up for tomorrow i hear you asked?
well,
it's work,
meeting pat-y; for movie prolly and her company's function,
then dinner and sky thereafter.

gonna drop by rivervine too,
'cause jordon's playing with his band.
and there's a house party with the usual bunch again!
LOVELOVE!

okok.
let's talk about last weekend.

was supposed to meet connie on saturday,
but called off 'cause i couldn't spend much time with her.
and i went to zoukout!
lalas~

stayed the night at Shangri La with 6 other people;
namely Andy, William, Daphne, Jason, Derek and Chris.
was fun la!
fagged and ate alot of sweets!
I WAS SO HIGH!!!~
*fly*

it's really fun watching people mambo!
i'm afraid i'll start mambo too,
that'll be scary~
but but,
mambo is fun la!
maybe i should mambo too!

be like Andy.
never fail to mambo on wednesdays,
for closing 10 years!
WHOA~

i fall sick after zoukout.
like once i stepped out,
i'm unwell lo.
):

went over to my granny's place after leaving sentosa,
slept till dinner time and mingled around for a while.
went to the supermarket before cabbing home,
to get muchies to store in my office's drawers.
GLUTTON!!

worked half day on monday,
was feeling terrible and slept most of the day away.
went to the doctor on tuesday,
and doctor prescribed me 2 days MC with lotsa disgusting medicine.

slept and woke up to prepare for dinner.
hogsbreath's not as nice as when i'm all well and about.
but company was great!
Andy,Mike,Alan,Adele,Stephine and Sulaiman.

took a bus home after parting our ways.
luckily there're seats around,
if not i guess i would get off and cab home instead.
LOLS.

oh.
did i mention that everyone's looking at me when i was about to take my medicine?
they're staring at my pills and teaching me how to swallow etc.
damnh funny and awkward at the same time.
Andy even had to feed me the cough syrup,
and it took 10 mins!

i'm such a baby!
i feel so loved!
heees~

i didn't go to st james last night.
was forbid by so many people to go,
so i've been a good girl staying home.

and now,
i'm back to work.
gonna settle down and finish my stuffs for this week.
(:

sorry peeps!
it's a lengthy post,
but you enjoyed reading it,
doncha?!

yes!
i'll upload some videos soon!
-evil laughters-
@ 11:32 AM


will blog soon.
currently horribly sick!
down with the flu bug!!
):

take cares everyone,
please do not fall sick too!!

and remember to keep yourselves warm,
it's cold.~

(:

Let me sleep till the end of time.
@ 11:51 PM


i beginning to hate.
i guess through the years pass by,
everyone changed.

it's time for me not to expect so much,
maybe it's time for me to be kind to myself too.
i do not deserve all this torments.

but come to think of it,
i'm actually the one bringing it all upon myself.
'cause i want things to go my way and smooth.
wishful thinking,
fuck it.

everywhere's up with christmas decorations already,
and you can hear them playing the christmas carols.
have you planned for your christmas?

proxy says that it's a magical christmas this year,
love is all around he reckons.
mikey will be over in the states already by then,
so he's going to celebrate it there;
WITHOUT me AND andy.

pfft.
as for andy,
hmmms.
prolly stay home or what,
will ask him about it soon.

now what about me?
i wish for christmas to come slow,
when it's here,
it only meant that the year is coming to an end.

and i've not done anything.
how sad is that,
hopefully i'll have something nice this christmas.

till then~
@ 5:39 PM




@ 11:59 AM


i'm alone in the office!!!
susan's got 3 days mc,
and bosses are out!!!
):

it's good to spend some time alone in the office,
doing my own work and all.
but but but!
i do get stuck IRC-ing at times!
LOLS.

let's talk about yesterday.
it was wednesday,
so everyone knows what day it is for me?
DANCE DANCE~

and it was william's birthday,
poor him got so drunk and puked all over himself.
alan gotta send him home after everything.

i did somewhat enjoyed myself a little,
but was feeling uncomfy the whole time;
friends were getting to clingy onto each other just at the first meeting.

and i got a terrible headache from last night till this morning.
):

oh!
i overslept today!
luckily darling foresee it and called me!
if not...

thanks love!
for everything!
i'm so stuck to you now!
how how?!?!

do you feel the same way as i do?
SHOW ME LOVE,
GIMME LOVE!
mwahs~

alrights,
i don't know what i'm blabbering about already.
gonna go sort some documents out,
and delete some texts.

HAPPY BIRTHDAY WILLIAM!!!(:

Dancing with my baby in summer rain.
@ 11:41 AM


_TAURUS - The Tramp_

Aggressive. Loves being in long relationships. Likes to give a good fight for what they want. Extremely outgoing. Loves to help people in times of need. Good kisser. Good personality. Stubborn. A caring person. One of a kind. Not one to mess with. Are the most attractive people on earth!

~~~
oh,
so how true is that above reflect on me?
pretty cool huh?
LOL.

Let's spend all the time in the world together.
@ 10:43 AM


my 501th post!!!
dedicated to my 'son',
TANXUNHONG.

he's going to serve the nation next friday.
i got to know him from IRC,
'cause my work is slack,
thus got quite some time to chat all the time.

LOLS.
he's lives kinda near me.
planning to meet him on next monday after work,
could go for dinner or something.

must take care of yourself ok sonny?
mummy will be missing you!
*hugs and kisses*
@ 4:21 PM


Tan XiaoWei, the birthday girl!


@ 11:16 AM


- Do the following without complains.
- Choose 5 people to do this quiz after you've done yours.
-Tag the chosen one.
-Start your post with "i've been tagged".

_Favourite/s . . ._

Colour: White,Black,Orange,Red,Blue,Purple,Yellow and Brown.
Food: Hogsbreath Cafe's Steak! The Food that granny cooks! yum yum~
Movie: No much recollections of the movies I'd watched.
Sport: Hockey! wheee~
Day: Wednesdays; my official 'hiao' day. And the weekends; the 'ME' days. (:
Season: Monsoon; stay home and sleep with my stitches! =/
Ice cream: Ben&Jerry and Hagen Daaz.

_First . . ._

Bestfriend: Not in contact anymore.
Crush: Weihao when i was in Bendemeer Primary School.
Movie: Some disney cartoon i reckon?
Music: I can't remember.

_Lasts . . ._

Drink: Water as in H2O.
Car ride: To work.
Crush: None. I'd prefer making the person mine than to crush and keep mum.
Phonecall: Last night from my brother in the middle of the night,asking me to open the doors for him. -.-
Cd played: Some Hokkien karaoke CD.
Gone out with good friends: Last friday! To photo shoot with Andy and Mikey. Going out with Connie on the coming Saturday! :D

_Did you . . ._

Broken a law: No.
Been arrested: Nopes.
Been on TV: Yea,forgot when though.
Kissed someone you don't know: When i played a game and got forfeited.

5 things i am good at:

1) Whining!
2) Laughing!
3) Bullying my twin towers(Andy and Mikey)!
4) Loving everyone around me! lols.
5) Eating! woots,my love!

People to tag [No repeating] :

1) Connie; she doesn't blog anymore.
2) May; she wouldn't have time to do so.
3) Xiaoai; that's busy woman,not blogging for long long time already.
4) ShengChen; super free right? Help you pass time! hahas.
5) Whoever comes around and have a place to get tagged. :P


*Well, I didn't complain while doing this. And thanks huh XiaoWei, for tagging me! grrrr~

Last but not least,

HAPPY 17th BIRTHDAY TO YOU XIAOWEI!
may all your wishes come true,
long lasting with Donald!
hope that you'd enjoy your day!
@ 10:24 AM




@ 11:39 AM


there's something in me,
it's eating at me bit by bit.
the feeling SUCKS BIG TIME!
and you'll get all emotional from it.

i always feel that i'm not good enough,
for everyone, for everything.
i would go the miles and try to perfect all i can,
to not bring disappointments to those around me.

i'm afraid to love;
it's horrible to have your heart given away,
and returning in broken pieces.
love is strange like magic.

it's not that i'm not happy and comfortablw with myself,
it's merely sometimes,
when it's dark and quiet in the night,
or when something strikes a thought in you.

that's when the devil is at work.
oh,
how great is that!

how much i disgress it.
no matter how much many people's love i have,
it's always the faults that's thinning it out.
when faults are thick,
love is thin.

i may appear to be strong and with no worries,
it's just the mask;
just the front i'm putting up.
to avoid getting too much hurt,
to just shake off anything that's negative.

but deep down inside,
there's a place;
where a little girl lives

who's all stained with blood;
in her now no longer shimer white gown.
there are bruises all over her body,
wounds may heal but the scars;
are all so tangible.

her mind;
thinks that the world isn't so beautiful anymore.
after all,
it's monstrous.

she didn't dare to wish for,
to hope for or even dream that someday;
someone, let alone a prince nor a hero,
just anyone would come to lead her out to where the sun shines bright,
the grasses are greener and no unhappiness are felt.

her hands;
she keeps to herself.
pulling her legs up to her chest,
she cradles herself close ball-liked,
as she stays in that dark little crib.

Everyone needs a place to adumbrate.
@ 10:07 AM