Saturday, September 29, 2007
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2:29 AM
Friday, September 28, 2007
so why wouldn't you leave me alone yet?since you've done so much so much trying to ruin my life,trying to make it a living hell.and you must be darn happy now,'cause i'm suffering under all these nonsense.can't you like just get out of my life?!
you don't have to tell me anything about you anymore,'cause i wouldn't give a damn already.stop putting up a false font in front of me,goddamn it.all along i know what's going on in your mind,since now things have come to this state,just why wouldn't you make a decision and get on with life?it's not fair for anyone,everyone.don't push all the things to me,you just can't look at yourself and reflect;that's why you're acting in this way.you just make me sick!i know she'll be able to bring you up,and soar above the mountians.so just go,EVERYTHING'S THE PAST ALREADY.
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5:20 AM
Wednesday, September 26, 2007
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1:46 AM
seriously i don't need to know who you're bringing home,who you're seeing at the moment or whatever.it just concerns me no more,just why can't you understand that and let me lead a happier life?it has been a tough period for me,and i really wanna let go so badly.for all the things you've done wrong,you'd never felt in that wrong.you hide and hide,i'm been very nice;closed one eyes and hinted you time and again.and i just watch it goes down the drain,fark all the efforts which you could see nothing.when you did that horrible mistake,i still stood by you,took all the humiliation and whatever you threw.was i not giving you enough or just too much that you're straying?it's hard to break it to you,but i hope that you'll stay away from me;you've gotten me into enough trouble,so save the hassle for me now please.i've got myself to blame too,for getting myself too into all those shit.i deserved it,now i fall;i'll get up on my own for i've turn a deafening ear to the others when they tried to help.but nevertheless,i still thank those people who love me up till now,for all the mistakes and disappointment i've caused.(:---------------------------------------------------------------goodness!!!!the cough isn't getting any better!!i'm like gonna die from it already la.):this year's mid autumn's a bore.supposed to go out with some IRC people,but went to grandpa's instead.'cause i couldn't get a cab and it was getting too late,so mum dragged me to her dad's place.mooncake was yummy though.i had like 4 small slices,and i had to refrained myself,if not here come the sleepless tonight.what difference does it make either,i'm sleepless almost every night.sleeping at crazy hours after 6am everyday.woots!gonna have tuition at 3pm later,BOOS!*cough cough*Gotta go my own way.
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1:20 AM
Monday, September 24, 2007
i should blog,shouldn't i?while waiting for the starhub's care consult to pick up my call,daddy's in tuas and his line's switched to malaysia's;couldn't make any calls out.so being the all-time-nice daughter,i'm helping him to solve the problem.hahas.nothing much happened over the weekend,just that i got sick;cough,slight fever and flu.i dread going to the doctors,think they're evil,and they scare the hell out of me.went out with May and Edz yesterday,to some fleamarket in china square,dinner at maxwell market,and walked around town.Edz left early to fetch his parents,(which i don't know if it's true or not),so the girls went to TCC to chill.bumped into Yuwen on the way home.it's been oh-so-long since i go public.gosh~
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8:44 PM
Thursday, September 20, 2007
damn.stop calling and telling me what to do and what's not.i lead my own life and you're nobody to tell me what i should do with it,aren't you like sick of doing that?i just don't understand,is it because your life ain't going the way you want it to be,so you come and try to manipulate my life the way you want it.to hell with it.i do whatever i want,and the decision is MINE.i practically slacked the whole of today away,slept in the morning and all the way till evening,afterwhich got up to watch some tv and get online.nothing special,that's what i've been doing for i-don't-know-how-long.i'm going to sleep soon again.dang it,why am i sleeping so much nowadays.screw the body clock in me.
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11:59 PM
so i'm home from ladies night at st james.there's a high platform today,some events was going on.when i got there,the event'd ended.dancefloor's open!!couldn't dance much today,overworked my poor legs already.sighs.anyway,i met up with may for dinner after tuition.it's good seeing her after so long!!and may,if you're reading this.i'm SORRY!i should have told you what was going on,so you wouldn't be so pissed.=/will blog later,suddenly lost the feel to do it.LOLS.COMPLICATED MATTERS.
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4:04 AM
Wednesday, September 19, 2007
i have the need to blog.
i want to blog it all out,
but there's just too much on my mind.
and there's no way that i could get it all out,
i can't.
i just can't.
there are things that i cannot put it into words,
and i can't put it up here.
i choose not to tell anyone else too,
simply because nobody will understand.
and they'll just try to pacify you,
telling you everything'll be fine.
it wouldn't.
it'll just come back all again another time,
by then it's too late to wanna solve it,
'cause it's been snowballed into bigger issues.
sometimes i hate being me,
i'm so caught in between things all the time,
it's such a sticky situation that i couldn't get out of.
damn.
i don't know what the heck am i typing.
i'm just venting it all out on my oh-so-poor blog.
SHUCKS!
i'll blog later when i've a clearer mind to think.
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1:12 AM
Sunday, September 16, 2007
pictures are taken on my brother's birthday which was last week,and are being uploaded randomly.camho's~
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1:28 AM
Finally!the events are over!and i'm here to upload the overdue pictures since forever.hahas.i'm oh-so-tired.i deserve all the lost rest,and i'm going to enjoy it.though the events were a flop,but last night's was a fun one i think.i've got so many comments from different people;"did you pop diet pills? you lost weight babe!""how did you cut off the weight man?!""you look so different. it seems so long that we last met."on and on,etc etc.oh and one more."you looked so demure,all girly and nice with you super high heels and short shirt when you're sitting outside doing work. but when you came in,man did you get the party started. the music played and you're on the dance floor for hours making the media crew worked their ass off featuring you all the time."LOLS,i couldn't help but laughed so hard when my friend told me that.the bouncers were saying that maybe we all should meet at the dancefloor,i'm a good dancer,and named me the dancing queen.hahas.thanks for the great night guys,and the compliments!(:i enjoyed myself last night!woots~
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1:04 AM
Friday, September 14, 2007
and so.i went to the arts house with dearest Edz just now,it was awesome.i spotted a familiar person's picture even before i set foot in there,and gracious;it's really who i thought it was.Adrian;that bartender from attica,who someone had a crush one eh.heees.picture was kinda well taken,showing his tattoos;which i notice all the time.there were pictures of celebrities too,i couldn't get enough of the exhibition though,think that it's potrayed too little pieces.oh wells,the big day is tomorrow.i've been working my ass off,i hope it seriously pays off.no more loss made please!i've got a long long day tomorrow!tuition in the morning,coffee or nap till 2 in the noon,afterwhich's preparation for event till the event starts,and going on into the wee hours.i'm going have a good rest after that.Oh, what you do to me? I'm in such a dilemma.
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1:03 AM
Thursday, September 13, 2007
i've got pictures to upload to show you people,but i just didn't have the time to do it yet.been busy with my events and some other stuffs,fighting for survival too.hahas.i'm going out to the art house soon,for some tattoo exhibitions.woots.i'm not getting tattoos though,just looking around.(:a little commotion occured last night,but things're fine now.too much to be elaborate,so pass on.i'll get the pictures and abouts of my life up soon.party in orchard coming up tomorrow,hope it turns out well!laters~I hope you know, I hope you know. I hope you know how I feel about you.I hope you know how much I need you. I hope you know everything. I hope I knew everything.I wish I knew how to help.I wish I could just be there.Most of all, I wish I knew how to handle you in any situations possible.I love you.
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7:53 PM
Wednesday, September 12, 2007
Randoms pictures of me being way too bored.
Wrote my friends name and took pictures with it before sending them.
Red nail polish's the sex to me now.
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5:20 AM
Saturday, September 08, 2007
-look at his happy face with his "cake"(gyoza) and joanne's lian hua zhi. lols
HAPPY BIRTHDAY BROTHER; LIONEL CHUA!!!one more year to 8teen,and you should be more mature than before aye.study hard,it's for your own good.
i know you have everyone's interest at heart,but know that;it's hard to please all.just do as your heart follows.(:i'm glad that i've got you as my brother,I LOVE YOU!happy 7teen!hope you enjoyed yourself,and may your wishes all come true.
- anticipating the "cake's" arrival to him.
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11:52 AM
Tuesday, September 04, 2007
you;think about nothing else except yourself.it's all about you that matters,things should always go your way,and how you want it.no matter what's right or wrong,you're the greatest.but boy,you're so wrong.let me tell you this,i don't see a successful you in the near future.it's all talks about plans not being executed,i don't see you going anywhere.you can go on like this for as long as you want,cause' i'm gonna stay and wait no more.too much things been a wasted,and that's enough.as for you,make your stand.say what you want and what you don't,i'm not going to be around forever.i've and will move on,just what's going on through your mind.and you(s),stop all your whinings,stop ruining my mood all the time.all of you don't know what i'm feeling inside,i can feel it coming soon,i can't hold out any longer,and it's anytime,really.presently,i'm feeling as if i'm being trapped in this small box.i can't breathe,i feel so stressed out.there's nothing i can do,and no one's there to help me.it's all just talks,and know that;words are cheap,they carry no weight.none of you can say that you understand how i feel,you're not me,so you don't.i'm so depressed that i could cry all so suddenly,how i wish i could figure a way out.nobody knows,that's the other side of me.i'm not being emotional here,it's just all the agony that's been bottled up for so long,they longed to be released.stop forcing me!i've got depression.
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11:16 PM
Sunday, September 02, 2007
it's been such a long long time since i blog again.i'm sorry i've neglected you blog-love,i was just too busy with my life.i'm doing fine nevertheless,just a little stressed out sometimes.but i'm enjoying everything i do.below are the oh-so-random pictures of connie and i,cam-whoring in the toilet.mental block,update again;so till then.(:
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8:02 PM
-look at his happy face with his "cake"(gyoza) and joanne's lian hua zhi. lols
Tell me what you want.